Reading this is an actual cognitive hazard.

Hell yeah, praxis! It might also vary by branch too.

Yeah, Iraq fucked my head up too, and I was there much later after the major combat. What stopped me in my tracks was when I saw pictures of the places I patrolled from before the invasion. I was a dumbass kid that the empire (and my family and local community) indoctrinated into believing war was good. I was hollowed out and turned into a souless pawn, trained to murder. Me getting killed for being there would have been justified and just.

I’m thankful that I’ve lived long enough to see the truth and change. Now I get to help people heal and grow for my job, and my experience gives me a deep conviction. Hopefully some of these people can change for the better and contribute positively to society. I’m not holding my breath though, few to none of my former colleagues are comrades today. I can’t say if I have any sympathy for them, maybe because I feel me being killed in Iraq would have been justified. I’ve suffered for what I did, it doesn’t absolve my culpability though. I just try to keep a materialist analysis in mind and help people understand and change the material conditions that are pushing them into abhorrent behavior or just hurting them.

If you meet someone in military service who seems to have some moral conflict, let them know they can object to the conditions of their service and get out. I wish someone had talked to me about that when I was in.