No one believese, but I swear one time the stores lights were fucky at a Roomstore location I was driving by, and it looked like Poonstore.

Never have I read finer poetry.

PENVS

Lol I didn’t last time and had to hire a second set of movers. And those second motherfuckers stole my cell phone.

You mean like having movers coming in a few weeks but not getting off my ass for the past five days to start putting my life into boxes to move halfway across the country? Cuz it feels like you might be referring to my having movers coming in a few weeks but me not getting off my ass for the past five days to start putting my life into boxes to move halfway across the country.

He shopped out his lips.

Meowing is very common among cats. Go look up videos on YouTube where people attach GoPros to their outdoor cats and see them interact with other cats in the neighborhood.

They struggle to make ends meet during periods of economic downturn because 1) they are “wealthy”, but not “filthy fuckin’ rich”, and 2) they live almost beyond their means and…when they have to “cut” back…it involves downsizing the Beamer 7 Series to a Volvo S90 and spending two weeks in Hawaii on vacation instead of a month in Europe.

For most of the working class who are well off enough to be able to afford a roof and know where our next meal is coming from, they are one bad month away from couch surfing.

To the “wealthy” in this scenario, I say to you tighten up those bootstraps…quit eating avocado toast and all that.

To the “filthy fuckin’ rich”, I say this: Guillotines exist for a reason.

Whycome only occasionwhile?

Because they both forgot punctuation marks and didn’t put the comment on the photo itself. If Sorse just adds the punctuation, we can achieve perfection.

Yours is the closest to correct, but still not quite right. It said to comment ‘thank mr skeltal’ and yours is missing the punctuation marks.

And you simply must begin and end every sentence with uWu, obviously.

Wait a minute…using an RX modulator, I might be able to conduct the mainframe cell layer and hack the uplink to the download. It means with the right computer algorithm, I can hack you back in time, just like a time machine.

Straight dating online is like trying to find drinkable water in a crisis situation; women are stranded in the ocean, and men are stranded in the desert.

“Arizona toddler…died”

Brian Regan once equipped that he had taken a speed-reading course. “Since then, I can read 2000 words per minute. But…my comprehension’s plummeted.”

I only date women who do exactly what they want to do and not what society says they should do. As it happens, they generally don’t wear makeup every day.

“Oh…no, no, no honey, the steel foil hat doesn’t go with that outfit, try the gold one.”

I might end up studying to get a math/physics endorsement when I start teaching in Oregon next year. The district I’ll be teaching for has in their collective bargaining agreement that each teacher can request funds for certification exams, and they offer $1000 each year for postgraduate work, so why not? No district I’ve taught for in Texas offers anything like that.

I have been trying since January to get a teaching job in Portland (I live in Dallas) for the next academic year, and this week I was offered positions by two different school districts. This weekend, I have been working out which job to go with, I think I’mma go with the one that pays a little more, might be able to offer funds to offset relocation costs, and has less trafficky access to downtown and Vancouver (I have friends in North Portland and Vancouver.

So yeah…got that figured out; tomorrow I’ll be looking for an apartment, taking my kids to Terry Black’s for some world-class barbecue before Texas is forever in my rear-view mirror, doing some packing, and playing some THPS 1+2.

As someone with ASD, GAD, and MDD (all diagnosed if it matters), smart home devices are an essential service to me. I can quickly set redundant reminders to help me with personal routines, add stuff to my shopping and to-do lists, and quickly get my lights and music set to what I need them to be when I am experiencing an anxiety episode. I definitely understand that my data is good and harvested at this point, and I don’t trust them to have done anything good with it. But these dots have made my life work since I bought my first one, and they’ve significantly reduced the anxiety I used to be riddled with.