I have a sizable collection of games across retro and current platforms, as well as a Steam Library and a huge itch.io bundle of software. I have opportunities abound for games that I could play. But some days, I get stuck trying to figure out
- Which game to play
- How long do I have to play it
- What about other stuff I need to do
- How can I turn this into something meaningful
And it only gets compounded when I try to factor in streaming or writing for a website that I’m a part of. I dunno how many other Twitch/YouTube/TikTok streamers are here but once you reach Affiliate or have a consistent audience it sure seems easy to feel like your gaming time should only happen when you’re streaming. And as a hobbyist writer I feel like I then have to tie in writing about my gaming experiences.
I don’t have anything closely resembling success with these ventures but it feels like if I stop, then I’ll never have that success, like, it feels obtainable when I’m turning my hobby into digestible content for others.
I’ve been trying to break out of this self-defeating cycle by starting a new island in Animal Crossing. Just making small progress, an hour a day, by myself. No distractions, no mental hangups, no “side hustles”.
Just wondering if I’m alone in this or if anyone else has similar experiences, whether or not you stream or whatever :)
I do but try to remind myself that “wasting my time” is a concept that capitalism has forced on us bc they want us to feel guilty when not productive.