• JackbyDev@programming.dev
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    2 days ago

    My best guess is that she wanted things to be slow emotionally and has baggage associated with Valentine’s day.

    • SuperSpruce@lemmy.zip
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      2 days ago

      Which is why if I had one moment to change my decision on, it would 100% be this. I f*cked up big-time, and it cost me my heart and lots of hot make out sessions for a stupid lesson.

      • maks@sh.itjust.works
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        2 days ago

        Dude, you couldn’t have known. I know it’s hard, but you shouldn’t dwell on it

        You did everything right, it just wasn’t the right time or the right person. You’re not to blame at all - if it was an issue on her side, she should have talked about it instead of coldly friendzoning you

        Just to be clear, I asked my wife what she thought, and she thinks the same thing

        • SuperSpruce@lemmy.zip
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          2 days ago

          Thank you so much for your advice! With how little experience I have, it is really tough to not trigger a mine in the dating minefield.

      • JackbyDev@programming.dev
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        2 days ago

        Stop overthinking it. Unless there really is some additional context you’re not sharing (not accusing you of that, but I try to be skeptical with tales like these, AITA posts broke me lol) then I don’t think you’ve done anything wrong. Some people just have landmines. Sometimes they know about them, sometimes they don’t. Sometimes they realize it was stepped on, sometimes they don’t.

        Even if it wasn’t that and she only wanted a passionate fling and you wanted something lasting, this would’ve happened eventually. It’s hard, but try to remember the fun for what it was and don’t overthink this. Self reflection is important, no doubt, but this doesn’t seem like the time.