I am low on money these days and my life is hell for it. I have to do with substandard everything in my life I recently had an incident where an elderly woman asked me for money while roaming the street with her family begging for money. I had no money to spare, but had I had any, I wouldn’t have given a penny to her (Life is tough, I can’t give away money I didn’t earn)

But, she later said something which melted my heart, “Majboori hai beta!” (Hindi) “We don’t want to do this, but we have to do it son” (now add some emotional value to it), I didn’t know what to do, I was on my cycle and I could feel their eyes on me as I passed them and I just peddled faster with teary eyes.

I didn’t know how to deal with that. i.e., I don’t have enough money for medical necessities or to improve the standard of living of my own life, but I was being asked to spare change by a poor family that was demonstrably in a worse spot than me.

I was always taught that if you give beggars money, they will spend it all on alcohol (not blaming them), and given the number of beggars who have come to be smelling like alcohol and death with wobbly balance, it has been a rule not to provide them with money. Also, let’s not forget, if you’re really poor (homeless and have nothing to lose) and you are really desperate, you are often dangerous i.e., not someone around whom your kids can roam, again, not blaming them. But… I don’t know what is right or wrong in this situation!

How do you deal with external problems you can’t solve around you? What is the moral thing to do here?

edit: This kinda reminds of a story about Jesus where a prince once came to him and told him that he isn’t at peace with himself no matter what he does, and Jesus told him that to get peace he must give away everything to the poor and follow Jesus around and the prince refused (something along those lines).

I know what the most moral thing might be in this case, but even if you tell me that I should give money to those who live in abject poverty, I probably won’t do it as often as I should.

  • schmorp@slrpnk.netEnglish
    1·
    4 months ago

    Improve your local community in other ways. Or give in other ways. Not sure what would apply in your local community - I live in rural Western Europe and that’s very different from what you describe. People here set up donation boxes, swap shops, create food banks, organize markets, create safe spaces for minority groups, community gardens … mostly volunteering time. Not sure you are in the position to do this? Sorry things are so heartbreaking. I hope we all figure this out soon.

  • RBWells@lemmy.world
    1·
    4 months ago

    As you should? You can’t think like that. In a religious sense, sure. If you have two coats you stole one from the poor, to paraphrase Dorothea Parker.

    But in real life, it’s more like the airplane advice, put on your air mask first then help others with theirs. In an absolute sense you will be able to give more if you take care of yourself. If you only have $2 and give someone $1 of it you are an angel, but if you can make more and feel comfortable giving $10 that is more helpful to someone.

    You didn’t create this problem, you just live in it, and you can’t single handedly fix it. Take care of yourself and give as you can, and speak out when you can.

  • BevelGear@beehaw.org
    0·
    4 months ago

    I’m on the fence about giving money to homeless people on the streets, but am all for donating to / volunteering for organizations that help them.

    My reason starts with how organized and strategic they can be. For example, I was waiting at a bus stop downtown and there were three homeless people planning out which intersections they were splitting to next and how they were going to divide the total afterwards.

    Second example in downtown. There’s a guy begging for food in the mall, so I take him to the nearest food stand, we both order a meal, and eat at a table. He was talking about his plan to get off the streets and all and went back to refill his drink after eating. During that time, I went to the cashier for something and she told me he’s with a few others that come back pretty regularly. When we get back to the table, he then tells me that he needs $10 for a place to stay for the night and then leads me to the nearest atm. Once we’re there, I tell him everything the cashier told me and he doesn’t say anything with an “ok you caught me look”. I still give him the money even though he knows that I know he’ll be back doing the same thing.

    I know this is is not the case for all homeless people, such as the meal I had with one with mental disabilities, but it’s a mixed bag. Just do what you can and don’t feel bad if you can’t.

    • schmorp@slrpnk.netEnglish
      1·
      4 months ago

      Why should the homeless have no right to organize? It’s funny that the only places with (rough but efficient) functioning self-organization I could find so far were among the homeless and the small folk. Those with stuff left to protect are too much up their own arse to want to play well with others.

      Also, the plans to get off the street are real, most of the time. Every kindness you show is a seed that one day will point towards the right direction.

      I’ve been hanging out with the homeless as a kid, and lived on the streets for a few months as a young adult, travelling and panhandling. I met many very kind, and often very damaged people. They are on the streets because it’s for a variety of reasons the only option they can manage, not because they enjoy scamming you out of a few coins and do nothing all day.

      If you are concerned about your money look at the suit wearing people, most of it ends up with them.

  • nocturne@sopuli.xyz
    0·
    4 months ago

    I volunteer at a food bank once a week. The woman who runs it knows I encounter a lot of homeless camps while hiking with my dogs, so she has me take care packages to deliver to some of them. We are having a very hard time getting can openers, which sucks because so much food we give out is canned. I try and buy any can openers I see at the flea market. But have also purchased a dozen for people in the last few months.