It always comes from the “nice guys” type. But it is also commonly said on TV that women love douchebags and therefore love being abused. In an episode of Family Guy, Quagmire or Brian tells Stewie that women enjoy being abused, so mistreating them will get them a girlfriend. This idea is obviously wrong and damaging. It perpetuates the idea that women are weak and need to be mistreated in order to be loved, when in reality the opposite is true. Women should be respected and treated with kindness, not abused in any way. This insanity about women should never be tolerated, no matter the context. Not only does this hurt women emotionally, it always leads to physical violence. It contributes to a dangerous cycle of abuse, as women may start to believe that this kind of treatment is normal and acceptable. Abuse of any kind is never okay and it is important to be aware of the damaging effects it can have on people. This shit is exemplified by the case of Brock Turner, who was convicted of sexual assault and served only three months in prison. His lenient sentence was seen by many as evidence that society does not take sexual assault seriously, and that it is somehow acceptable to harm and take advantage of women.
My opinion (I have no doubt I am right about this) is that sexism is the foundation of fascism…
My brother who considers himself a leftist and defines his views as socialist. “Nice guys finish last” and “women love bad boys” are a couple of ridiculous things he often says. Despite the fact that my brother is pretty “popular” with women, he doesn’t understand that the women he dates are almost always drug addicts or alcoholics. He dates them through Tinder. It’s basically the same thing incels do, judging all women based on this sex app called Tinder.
We should never measure a man’s success based on how many women he slept with. It always makes the men treat women like sexual objects or a trophy to put on a display. Fundamentally, they become an instrument to accomplish a goal. (I’m saying we should not “virgin shame” i know it’s tempting but try not to do it)
The idea that women only love “alpha males” is complete bullshit and ultimately hurts them. In doing so, it reinforces the dominant-submissive dichotomy. As in, the strong should rule the weak. Observe in the picture I posted that this shitty person compares women to children because of their perceived shared weakness…while asserting that men are stronger than them both…
“”“There is nothing worse in my book than a man who betrays the trust of those weaker than himself, be they children or women.”“”"
Having comedians like Louis C.K doesn’t help much either with jokes like "men fuck things up, women are fucked up”. What does that even mean you little shit??? Men are the ones who shoot up schools and throw acid at people when they’re rejected. Can’t they both fuck things up and also be fucked in the head at the same time? These “jokes” are casually accepted by most people… I am aware that most communists do not think that way, but based on the example of my brother, I am skeptical.
Also, this shithead in the picture says…””many women are understandably attracted to good looks in a man, and willing to overlook some pretty obvious character flaws if the man is, and perceived to be by other women, physically attractive””
It’s like they all think women are 14 year old tweens…They are all naive, according to them.
This is why I am not surprised when a lot of these men end up being child molesters…
There is a form of romanticising both the “alpha male” archetype and even abusive relationships to some extent, which enables abusers and participate in getting them into relationships.
But dominant capitalist patriarchal culture is the problem, not women
In The Will to Change, bell hooks speaks to the ways women (in the general) often uphold and reaffirm patriarchy and patriarchal standards.
She cites examples akin to what is stated in the quora post, but analyzed through a systemic, materialist lens rather than the myopic misogynistic shit posted here.
Far be it from me as a man to tell women what they ought to be doing, but I feel prof. hooks when she deconstructs the ways women can claim to desire vulnerability and emotional openness in men, but due to internalized patriarchy wind up shutting men down for being too emotional or too open - she claims she did this to one of her partners when he finally started opening up. I’ve had it done to me, for sure.
Interesting book, I’ll try to remember it!
I agree with what you said. As soon as I read your comment, I immediately thought of the movie and book 50 shades of grey.
Romanticising abuse… I did this a lot for a long time, got abused mentallly in a lot of ways, slowly have learned that it was not good or healthy. All stemed from my upbringing & later lonelyness as an adult.