Usually when someone is venting at me, I feel like I should respond somehow and say something, but I have no idea what that something could/should be. Is it better to just listen or try to comfort them in some way?
Usually when someone is venting at me, I feel like I should respond somehow and say something, but I have no idea what that something could/should be. Is it better to just listen or try to comfort them in some way?
Input from a clinical psychologist and therapist: That’s true but leaves out the fact that everybody responds better to validation (just like you described for women) unless they ask for advice or a solution. I’ll also say–this time only anecdotally–that even men requesting advice and answers often benefit much more from validation, especially when advice would not be helpful.
To add another part on from another clinical psychologist/therapist: it seems like sometimes just assuming what the person is looking for validation or help can cause some problems one way or the other. Sometimes just asking directly what they are looking for is worthwhile. It can be a beneficial exercise in clarifying expectations and takes out chance for a “wrong” (used VERY loosely) choice of approach or possibly missed signals. Personally and anecdotally, it seems to bring more awareness into the equation for everyone involved overtime (if doing so with a partner/friend/family member/etc.).