I’ve actually skipped work just to help a homeless guy get his beard trimmed. Bought him pizza too. Kinda hard to get anywhere in life when you look like shit.
Be kind to the homeless, they just need a helping hand here and there.
What would you do?
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100% this.
I was a volunteer treasurer at a youth homeless shelter.
Sadly, it’s not possible to evaluate someone’s intentions when they knock on your door and ask for a sandwich. They might truly just want a sandwich, or they might have other intentions entirely.
Our local cities have been shutting down homeless assistance and food banks. Even the churches aren’t allowed to help anymore… ☹️😭
It’s not typically the person that knocks that you gotta worry about, it’s the person that doesn’t knock that you really gotta worry about.
That’s not very true, unfortunately. Knocking allows someone to somewhat figure out if anyone is home, allows a person to gauge who is home (a man or a woman) and how easily the knocker can gauge overtaking them. Breaking in means the homeowner may have time to get a weapon and means the knocker will have to search for anyone home.
Getting them to come up to the door and see if they’re armed makes it easy if a person is looking for a victim. People just breaking in are usually hoping no one is home and just wants to rob the place.
I guess it partly depends how far out in the woods you live. The dogs will announce an intruder before they even get 100 feet close to your home, and I had my cats trained to knock on the door knocker, when they weren’t out eating rats anyways…
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You should never assume any stranger is safe. But take each person’s situation separately, some struggling people are actually legitimately honest.
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Honestly, the fella I helped didn’t even knock on my door, I knocked on his ‘door’, while he was resting at a local bus stop.
I had already known the fella for a few months in passing on my bicycle rides. I realized he was a good decent honest person, but he needed a haircut and beard trim.
Well, I happened to have trimmers, and figured that was the least I could do to try to help him out. That, and a pizza and a beer, just because…
Edit: Yes, I went out of my way to help this particular fella, he didn’t actually knock on my door. But, what if it was 120⁰F outside, and some stranger knocked on your door asking for help?..
Homeless or rich it doesn’t matter I just don’t trust people anymore. With that said though I will happily help guide them to resources and donate to shelters fairly often. I have some bad history with strangers so even though I’ve tried working through it there doesn’t seem to be much change.
You doing what you did is awesome and I bet really helped that guy with more than just a shave.
I am skeptical on letting my friends in my house. I am not going let a random person with high odds of having some sort of physical/mental issue in my house no thank you.
Will I help? Absolutely. Just in anywhere that isn’t my house.
First I’d wonder how they got through my security gate. I would not let them in. I’m a 5’3" middle-aged woman and I know my limitations, I’m not as young and strong as I used to be. I would talk to them through the door and not open it. If they said they wanted food and water, I might give them something but I would tell them to back up far away from the door before I put anything out there for them. Once they took it, I would ask them to leave.
Security gate is basically typing in 999
You seem to have “but what if” responses for every answer.
My answer is no because I don’t trust them. Same reason I keep my little dog away from all pit bulls, I don’t trust them. Same reason I accept some women want to keep distance with all men, lack of trust.
There’s water in the bubbler at my local park.
Yes, of course I intended on my post to be interpreted hypothetically. Every situation is different, and every person is different.
Hell no.
Are you u all living in rosy mc Rosewood Santa’s little safe harbour everything is fine and dandy rainbow world? Or are you all lying through your teeth?
Letting someone in your home with clearly visible psychological issues, in your circle of trust, filled with those you hold most dearly and packed with your dearest memories, that place… And then letting someone in you know nothing about?
Hell fucking no.
In the real world letting some rando homeless dude in your home has a 50/50 chance of ending up in crazy town. There is a high probability that you, yours or your stuff get fucked up. I cannot and will not accept those odds. Even a 2% chance of shit happening is a risk I’m unwilling to take when it comes to my kids.
Would I help him? Maybe. It depends on some factors (like can I at that specific time, did I help him out earlier, do I have cash on hand) Would I let him in? No f-ing way.
So real answer: money: maybe, eat & drink: anytime. Clothes: I’ve got some you can have, no problem. Bath and clean: nope. Never.
While I do agree with you. Your wording could be a little bit better. You seem like a glass half empty kind of person, and I can respect that. However your statement makes it seem like all homeless people have some kind of dangerous psychological issues, and that is a wild accusation. Mental health problems come in all shapes and sizes
As someone with diagnosed mental health issues, I can tell you that I mean no harm. But sadly, the pure difference in perception paired with unfamiliarity of the two parties makes the situation insanely dangerous, not the person.
You never know why the person is in this predicament and if they have a tendency towards violence, robbery or other things. I‘m not saying they are. I‘m saying you have to assume they are before making that decision. Can you defend yourself against a pulled knife or even gun, do you have enough mental capacity to observe them at all times. Those odds do not look good.
So, although I would never willingly look down on folks less fortunate than myself. I too will never ever let a stranger into my house if they raise any concerns.
“if they raise any concerns”
Yes indeed, those words sum it up pretty well. Everybody is different. Every situation is different.
Everyone deserves a chance though, with caution of course…
Very better wording. Sorry if I was seeming like a dick. I’ve always had the view that people generally mean no harm, but might have articulated it in the wrong way. I’m definitely trying to work on that with myself as well. I also have mental health issues, and I was homeless for a good 2 years of my life, and would have been longer if a person didn’t invite a scruffy person into their home and show them goodness and ask for nothing in return.
After I typed that, I had to think about it for a bit. I was probably one of the few lucky ones. I’ve had the experience working in movie theaters, and I’ve encountered many homeless and have had good and bad experiences. The bad is more memorable (which probably says more about human nature rather than social conception at this point), but had many great experiences with homeless people. I have stories, but I’ll save them for the sake of typing a shit ton lol.
TL;DR: I like the cut of your jib, you seem very intelligent, and have good points. However, I still believe the whole argument comes down to pessimis vs optimism. I’m a very long winded person, so tldr are hard for me
Thank you for your opinion, every individual is different. Homeless does not inherently equate to psychological issues nor drug addiction.
Sometimes people just had their house destroyed from a hurricane or tornado or whatever, and insurance done fucked them over, if they even had proper insurance in the first place.
Sorry you’re getting downvoted, but you got my upvote. Thank you for having enough of a mind and soul to care. 🤗👍
Honestly it’s a bad idea. Might be fine, might not be. Not worth the risk. Some unhoused folks are addicts or mentally ill. People tend to return to places that become familiar. The might come back again. Maybe to rob you.
I’m speaking from experience. I gave a guy a place to live to try to get back on his feet, in exchange for some work. Realized he’s a severe addict and couldn’t get rid of him. Then I look like the asshole for putting him back on the street.
I would offer to buy them a meal and pay for a low-cost motel room. I’d even be willing to buy them some toiletries to get cleaned up. I would not invite them into my home under any conditions.
“absolutely fucking not, and never come here again”
Sorry, but I’ll help people when I want to, on my own terms. Before you pile on, I literally just housed somebody for over a month, in the shitty one bedroom flat I rent. As in, they stayed on the sofa and only left on Tuesday. I also provided 90% of their food and gave them money to cover an outgoing debt payment.
It was a fucking huge inconvenience, actually. A helping hand is fine, but some people will happily take your whole arm.
Your last sentence strikes a hard truth, but I totally get you. Yeah, I ain’t suggesting anyone outright adopt a homeless person and wipe their ass every day and all, just saying that sometimes, depending on the circumstances and the individual, that it’s only proper to help for a day or three, within your means anyways.
Sandwich, bottle of water, directions off the property.
You mean directions towards the nearest shelters? It’s easy to tell someone to go away, but does it hurt you to try to help them locate proper shelter, instead of just tell them to go away?
I got kids, I’ll get you a sandwich and water while you wait outside but I don’t know them just like I don’t know any other stranger that showed up unannounced, that I would also not let in. If it was just me I have a higher risk tolerance, it’s going to be pretty close to zero when I have others who are dependent on me under my care. Sorry, not sorry.
Let’s say we’re in Arizona right now, hypothetical…
Let’s say it’s 120⁰F outside. You gonna leave the fella outside, only to die on your porch of heat stroke?
Edit: Ain’t that cute, I see I’ve been downvoted. Welp, if such a hypothetical situation happens, and someone dies on your porch in the heat, then you’d basically be guilty of negligent homicide since you could have helped, but refused to.
I’m not exactly a fan of having people die on my porch.
Don’t know where you’re at, but where I am, I have no legal obligation to help anyone trespassing on my property. That said, I would call the cops, so they can help him. While they may not be great at this, it’s their job (not mine), and I’m not risking my life. Maybe he’s honest in his needs. Maybe he’s not, and his intentions are nefarious. Do you know? I don’t, and I’m not willing to risk my life finding out.
A person knocking on your door and asking for help shouldn’t be outright considered as a trespasser, especially if all they’re asking is help. Of course you can’t trust just anyone, but still, if someone showed up and knocked on my door, sweating their ass off in the scorching heat of the summer and asking for help, I ain’t about to leave them out in the heat…
No I mean gtfo and deal with your own shit.
Hey, I ain’t mad, at least you said you’d help with the bare basics of a little food and water.
But what if it’s 120⁰F outside? What if they’re about to suffer a heat stroke on your porch?
Are you seriously asking if I react differently in different situations?
What if you were the person suffering in the heat? Should I open my door for you? Because if I could tell you were genuinely in need of help, I would…
I usually buy a meal for a homeless drug addict who sometimes it’s asking for some coins in a near mall, I don’t like to give him money straight cos I know he will buy drugs with it, I prefer to buy him something to eat.
Where I am there is not so much homeless people there is just poor people who asks for coins so no beard issue but I definitely like to give them something to eat instead of money for drugs.
We live in Canada in a very rural area. We’ve opened our door to strangers. Gave people a place to sleep and a hot meal, even let them live with us for a time to get their feet under themselves. I’d hope someone would do the same for my family if they needed it.
Side note: one of these folks is actually here today having supper with us and hanging with the kiddos. She’s got a job and a house now and going back to school in September. Two years ago we let her set her tent up here and use the washroom for a few weeks.
